Collecting water from springs on the half hour is poisonous

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[Scene: A countryside walk in the Cotswolds. Two friends, Emma and Tom, are carrying reusable bottles, planning to refill them from a local spring.]

Emma: (checking her watch) Oh, hang on, Tom. It’s 3:28. We’ll have to wait until half past to collect the water.

Tom: (raising an eyebrow) You mean 3:30, right? Isn’t that the half hour?

Emma: Exactly. And that’s the problem. You can’t take spring water on the half hour. It’s supposed to be poisonous.

Tom: (laughs) Poisonous? Emma, it’s literally the same water at 3:29, 3:30, and 3:31. The molecules don’t check your clock.

Emma: Don’t laugh! My gran always said it. She swore a neighbour once filled his jug bang on the half hour and ended up sick for a week.

Tom: Or maybe your gran’s neighbour left the jug in the sun and drank warm water. Or maybe he had a dodgy pasty for lunch. Cause and effect aren’t always linked.

Emma: Still, it’s strange, isn’t it? Why would the saying even exist if no one had a reason? Traditions don’t just appear out of nowhere.

Tom: (smiling) Emma, people used to think sneezing meant your soul was escaping. We said “bless you” to stop demons pinching it. Doesn’t make it true.

Emma: Well, better safe than sorry. If it’s half past, I’d rather wait. What harm does it do?

Tom: Fair point. Except, imagine you’re hiking, it’s scorching hot, and you’re parched. Are you really going to let your throat crack like the Sahara just because the clock says 12:30?

Emma: (pauses, frowning) I’d… maybe sip very carefully?

Tom: (grinning) A cautious sip of “half-hour poison”? That’s very scientific.

Emma: (laughs despite herself) Don’t mock me. Look, you rely on science, but not everything is in textbooks. People pass down wisdom for a reason.

Tom: True, but wisdom usually has evidence behind it. If I tested the spring at 3:29 and 3:30 in a lab, the chemical composition would be identical. No mystery toxins.

Emma: (teasing) And what if the test tube clock wasn’t synced to the spring’s secret timetable?

Tom: (dramatic sigh) Ah, yes, the mystical British Spring Time Zone. BST stands for “Bewitched Spring Time.”

Emma: (laughing) Now you’re just being cheeky.

Tom: Look, I get it. Superstitions make life colourful. But if you ever faint from dehydration because you wouldn’t drink at half past, I’m pouring water down your throat myself.

Emma: (smiling) Deal. But you’ll have to promise me it’s 3:31 first.

Tom: (checking his watch) Fine. It’s 3:32 now. Shall we live dangerously and refill?

Emma: (takes a breath, then laughs) Alright then. Here’s to non-poisonous hydration.

(They clink bottles like glasses and start filling up, still chuckling.)

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