Don’t stick chopsticks upright in a bowl of rice; it resembles incense at a tomb and is bad luck

Setting:
Two friends, Wei (the superstitious one) and Jun (the rational one), are having lunch at a small noodle shop in Chengdu.

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Wei: (gasping) Jun! What are you doing? Take those chopsticks out of the rice bowl—immediately!

Jun: (confused) Huh? What? I was just resting them there while I grabbed my phone.

Wei: Resting them? You stuck them upright! Like incense at a funeral! Are you trying to curse us both?

Jun: (laughing) Curse us? Wei, I’m just trying to send a text, not summon ghosts.

Wei: It’s not funny! My grandmother would faint if she saw this. She used to say doing that brings death into the house. That kind of energy sticks, you know?

Jun: I respect your grandma, but let’s be honest—there’s no scientific reason upright chopsticks summon spirits. It’s just symbolic.

Wei: Exactly! Symbols have power. You don’t mess with tradition. Remember what happened to my cousin after he mocked that ghost opera last year? Flat tire, broke his phone, and spilled hot pot on his date—all in the same week.

Jun: Or maybe he just had a terrible week. Correlation doesn’t mean causation. I once wore the same socks every exam week in college. Didn’t make me pass calculus.

Wei: You also didn’t fail, did you?

Jun: Touché. But seriously, traditions should be respected if they have a practical or cultural reason, not because we fear invisible chopstick ghosts.

Wei: It does have a reason! When you stick them up like that, it looks like the incense used in ancestor worship. That’s for the dead, not the lunch table.

Jun: So it’s about optics. Social context. That’s fair. But isn’t it better to explain that than to tell kids they’ll be haunted by their rice?

Wei: It works! Fear keeps people in line. Just like my mom telling me thunder meant the gods were punishing liars.

Jun: Or maybe thunder is just air pressure and lightning. Next you’ll tell me to avoid sweeping during Chinese New Year or my wealth will run away.

Wei: Obviously! You don’t sweep away good fortune. Why take the risk?

Jun: Wei, if fortune can be swept away by a broom, maybe it wasn’t that strong to begin with.

Wei: You always say that. But even Confucius said to respect the rituals. Without them, society loses harmony.

Jun: True. But he also encouraged learning. Questioning. If the ritual causes harm or spreads fear, isn’t it our job to understand it better?

Wei: Hmm. I guess… But would it kill you to just lay the chopsticks on the side like a normal person?

Jun: No, it wouldn’t. In fact, it might stop you from having a heart attack next time. (grins and adjusts chopsticks)

Wei: Thank you. Now the spirits can eat in peace.

Jun: And I can finally text in peace.

Wei: Just don’t type with the chopsticks. That might offend the Wi-Fi gods.

Jun: Now that’s a superstition I can get behind.