Always be the best version of yourself to keep evil at bay—like “knocking on wood” in other cultures

Ava: (sitting down with coffee) You look unusually polished today. New haircut? New shirt? Or did you join a boy band?

Liam: (straightening his collar) Very funny. I’m just… being the best version of myself.

Ava: You say that like it’s a magical spell.

Liam: It kind of is! You know that old belief—if you’re always your best self, evil can’t get to you. Like our version of knocking on wood. Bad vibes avoid people who have their lives together.

Ava: Liam, I’ve seen you trip over your own shoelace twice this morning. Evil definitely isn’t scared of you.

Liam: That’s exactly why I’m trying harder! When I look sharp and act sharp, it keeps negativity away. Yesterday I ironed my shirt before heading to work—and guess what? No disasters. Even the tram was on time!

Ava: Correlation isn’t causation. By that logic, I should iron my shirts every day to prevent my boss from scheduling surprise meetings.

Liam: Exactly! See, you’re getting it.

Ava: No, I’m not. You’re assigning cosmic significance to basic grooming and punctuality. That’s not supernatural protection. That’s just… being functional.

Liam: But don’t you ever feel like when you’re sloppy or lazy, the day just goes wrong?

Ava: Sure, but that’s because being sloppy makes me forget things, which causes problems. Like last week when I left my lunch at home because I was rushing. No evil spirits involved—just me versus my own brain.

Liam: Maybe the “evil” is symbolic. Like, bad luck targets people who don’t try?

Ava: Or maybe people who don’t try create their own “bad luck.” For example: remember when you didn’t study for that certification test because you thought your “good aura” would pull you through?

Liam: …Okay, that was one time.

Ava: You scored twenty-three percent.

Liam: The questions were worded weirdly!

Ava: They were literally multiple choice.

Liam: Fine, fine. But look—there’s something uplifting about believing that if you put in your best effort, the universe rewards you. It makes you feel in control.

Ava: I get that. It’s comforting. Lots of cultures have these “keep bad luck away” rituals. My grandmother used to tap her tea mug three times before drinking, swore it kept illness away. She still caught the flu every two winters.

Liam: Maybe she missed a tap those years.

Ava: (laughs) Liam!

Liam: Look, I’m not saying there’s literal evil floating around waiting for me to wear mismatched socks. I’m saying the belief motivates me. When I tell myself “Be your best or bad things will happen,” I actually show up better.

Ava: That part I can respect. Motivation is great. But the universe isn’t keeping score like some cosmic teacher with a behaviour chart.

Liam: Maybe not. But if believing that helps me be on time, polite, organised, and well-dressed… isn’t that harmless?

Ava: Totally harmless—until you refuse to leave the house because you had a “messy hair day” and think evil is lurking outside the door.

Liam: Okay, I admit that one time was dramatic.

Ava: You called in “unlucky.”

Liam: It worked! My boss said half the team was sick, so the meeting got cancelled anyway!

Ava: That’s not cosmic protection. That’s sheer coincidence plus flu season.

Liam: Maybe the universe helped a little.

Ava: (sighs but smiles) Fine. Believe what you want. Just don’t turn it into a full-time superstition. You’re great even when you’re not perfect.

Liam: Thanks. But still… doesn’t hurt to keep the evil away.

Ava: (leans in, whispers) You have a coffee stain on your sleeve.

Liam: WHAT?! Oh no—bad luck incoming!

Ava: Or maybe… just a napkin incoming. Relax.

Liam: You’re right. I’ll try to chill. But maybe just to be safe— (straightens dramatically) Best Liam activated.

Ava: (laughs) If evil spirits avoid that pose, I wouldn’t blame them.