Always leave the house through the same door you entered for good luck

Setting: Two friends, João and Lucas, are sitting in João’s kitchen in São Paulo after a Sunday lunch. João is tidying up, and Lucas is about to leave.

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Lucas:
Alright, man, thanks for the feijoada! I’m gonna head out.
(He walks toward the back door.)

João:
(Startled) Eh, eh, eh! What are you doing? That’s not the door you came in through!

Lucas:
Uh… I’m leaving? Through a door? Like humans do?

João:
No, no, Lucas! You have to leave through the front door. You came in through it. If you go out the back, it’s bad luck. Everyone knows that.

Lucas:
João, come on. You’re telling me the universe keeps track of my entry and exit points like some bouncer at a nightclub?

João:
(Dead serious) It’s not a joke! My tia Elza once let a guest leave through the window—don’t ask—and that same week, her washing machine exploded and her cat got pregnant.

Lucas:
Okay… that’s tragic for the cat and the laundry, but correlation isn’t causation, man. Maybe the cat was just a little too social, and the washing machine was on its last legs.

João:
You always say that! “Science this, science that!” But some things aren’t about science. They’re about vibe. Energy. Balance! It’s like… like feng shui, but Brazilian.

Lucas:
(Grinning) Brazilian feng shui now? I’d pay to see that TED talk.

João:
I’m serious! Think about it: the energy you bring in has to leave the same way. Otherwise, you mess with the harmony. My grandmother swore by it—and she lived to 98!

Lucas:
Right, but your grandmother also thought sneezing three times meant someone was gossiping about her.

João:
And she was usually right!

Lucas:
(Laughs) Okay, but hear me out. If I leave through the back door, and nothing happens—no exploding appliances, no surprise pregnancies—will you reconsider?

João:
(Pauses) Hmm… no. Because if something does go wrong, even weeks from now, I’ll blame you and that cursed door.

Lucas:
This is exactly why superstitions are so sticky! They only remember when the “bad thing” happens. Like that time I broke a mirror and you swore I’d have seven years of bad luck?

João:
Didn’t you get food poisoning two weeks later?

Lucas:
That was from your cousin’s dodgy street hot dogs!

João:
Still counts.

Lucas:
(Sighs) Look, I get that traditions make people feel safe. And hey, if it gives you comfort, I won’t judge. But there’s no magical GPS in the sky tracking your footsteps.

João:
Fine. You leave through the back door, you risk it. Just don’t blame me when your phone mysteriously dies or your Netflix account gets hacked.

Lucas:
(Mockingly dramatic) If I vanish, tell the police I used the wrong door.

(They both laugh. João opens the front door anyway.)

João:
Just to be safe—use this one. Humor me.

Lucas:
(Shaking his head, smiling) You’re impossible.

João:
And lucky. Don’t mess that up.

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[End Scene]